Table of contents:
- Why does a child is afraid of
- Fear has big eyes
- Is it possible to develop courage
- Methods which are better not used
- Fearlessness children: good or bad
To some degree lucky parents whose kidsabsolutely fearless: they are without problems in kindergarten, happy to stay for a while without parents with friends or neighbors, do not experience any discomfort in the new situation, do not be afraid to stay home alone and not be frightened even pitch dark. However, in all this there is also a negative, but more on that below. Our task - to see what the children are afraid of disturbing more often, and to find methods of dealing with their fears.
Why does a child is afraid of
The reasons for the fear of the child
There can be several. Here are some of them:
- The child is particularly impressionable: everything new seems to him at first scary.
- The kid was once someone or something scared - on a subconscious level, he was afraid.
- Bullied kid's parents are not thinking aboutthe consequences of "do not eat the whole mess - take Baba Yaga", "do not fall asleep right away - come Brownie." Adults, of course, say it all in jest, in the soul of the child is settled real fear.
- Scary baby tell older brother or sister, comrades in the kindergarten or school - some children are very fond of "horror stories".
If you can determine why the child has become something to be afraid, you will be much easier to convince and reassure him that his fears are completely unfounded.
Fear has big eyes
To answer the question, what are afraid of disturbing the children, andhow to prevent their fear, it is difficult, because sometimes it is simply impossible to suppose that may fantasize in your mind the child. Most often children are afraid of:
- Darkness: the child is afraid to stay alone in a dark room.
- Strangers: baby categorically refuses to get acquainted with them, not for a moment remain with "strangers".
- Friendly: at the sight of a cat or dog is trying to hide behind their parents, would not agree to pat even the cute puppy.
- Afraid of getting lost: all the time holding the hand of parents, afraid to let her go, even for a moment.
- Scarecrow flow machines: fear can not react in time to the green traffic light and left to stand still.
- He feels a sense of fear, communicating with their peers in kindergarten or school.
- Afraid to ask a question to the tutor or teacher.
- Coward, when thunder and lightning storm.
- Out of fear can not stay home alone.
- This fear can cause a child please adults go for something in the basement, shed or garage.
Is it possible to develop courage
Any personal qualities can be developed, includingincluding courage. Here, parents need to show not only perseverance, but also delicacy: in any case it is impossible to make fun of children's fears, talk about them to anyone in the presence of a third child; try to deal with them too abruptly, without moral training young coward.
Methods which are better not used
Often you can hear is the advice of more experiencedyoung parents: "Do not stand on ceremony! Solve it quickly - the child instantly switch their attention. For example, if he is afraid of the dark, never go at it on occasion - turning off the lights at once! Afraid to answer at the blackboard? Ask the teacher to cause him every day! "
Do not ever do. Put yourself in the place of the child: for example, you are afraid to climb on the roof of a ten-home, go to the edge and look down. You understand that the danger in this is really nothing and are willing to gradually overcome their fear, but you are required to do so immediately. What do you survive? Minutes of horror! Moreover, even if you come up to the edge, then do it almost unconsciously, that is to say no to your "victory" over itself will not. That's the same thing is going through a child when his parents, trying to quickly finish with the problem, try to solve it by violent means. He will go into a dark room, stay at home alone, pat an unknown dog - do everything you ordered, only because one of his fear will win the other - the fear of punishment by adults. It is not only the courage to add to it, but on the contrary, expand the range of his experiences.
First, be sure to find out exactly what heafraid and why decided that "it" scary. Try to explain the unfounded fears his child, help him overcome them. Make up a small training. For example, your child refuses to stay home alone. Ask him to stay without an adult only 5 minutes, then 10, 15 and so on. Fear gradually go away, and the kid will not even notice you're missing half an hour instead of an hour or more.
Fearlessness children: good or bad
If a child is afraid of something, but not allin a row - it's a normal reaction of the baby self-defense. He is exploring the world, trying to determine for themselves what is safe and what to avoid. At the same time, there is, as we have indicated above, children who are afraid of nothing. And if the first need to learn how to overcome anxiety, then with the second you need to conduct other work: they definitely need to make clear that one can not hesitate to go somewhere with a stranger, it is necessary to be careful on the road, observe the chain of command with educators and teachers, to be afraid of stray dogs etc. Their courage should be reasonable limits!
Do you want to bring up a harmonious person, devoid of complexes and fears? Be patient - and then everything will turn out: the child will successfully overcome any flimsy "danger"!